Gaspard <3's AA

I finally got around to watching A Cross The Universe.  [translation: my torrent for A Cross The Universe finally finished downloading, gah, that took forever].  I came across this screenshot and found it of great interest.  I wonder what Gaspard picked up from American Apparel.  Maybe it was the Poly-Cotton Stripe Crew Neck...or maybe it was the Melange Jersey Short Sleeve Deep V-Neck.  Or perhaps, it was the Baby Rib Boxer Brief (with or without the front opening, we'll never know).  Truth is, it's a mystery as to what he purchased.  All we can deduce from the photograph is that Gaspard isn't too cool to wear AA and therefore it will remain to be hip for at least two more seasons.   

Do you think he started to wear AA before his North American Tour [trend setter, ahead of the curve in France] or during his North American Tour [copy cat, behind the times].  Yeah, that's what I was thinking too.  

I'm Thankful for Memes

I'm thankful for memes

///I'm thankful for Ableton Live [for allowing talentless people to make shitty music]

///I'm thankful for Ray-Ban Wayfarers [for making it easier to pick the trendy people from a large crowd]

///I'm thankful for The Cobrasnake [for giving me coverage of all the rad parties I can't make it to]

///I'm thankful for HipsterRunoff [for delivering memes on a regular basis]

///I'm thankful for Pitchfork [for telling me what I have to listen to if I want to be cool]

///I'm thankful for mp3 blogs [for taking up space on my hard drive with obscure mp3's]

///I'm thankful for The Hype Machine [for pointing out the least obscure of the afformentioned 'obscure mp3's' so I won't waste time downloading them]

///I'm thankful for my altbros and althos [for accompanying me to my local dance parties]

///I'm thankful for fake ID's [for getting me into the afformentioned dance parties]

///I'm thankful for American Apparel [for making it possible to seem fashionable without actually being fashionable]

///I'm thankful for vinyl [I don't actually have any, but I feel like being thankful for it makes me more authentic]

///I'm thankful for my alternative life [for giving me a false sense of authenticity]

Marketing in 2K12

let me explain this alt bro's though process:

"wait, you're that Bronques guy right, the african-american party photographer?  oh rad, you should go to my shitty blog it's www.hotdog-wa... wait hold up, i've got a better idea, ANYBODY GOT A PEN????..."

Although this form of advertising may be called 'progressive' today, I read in a technology mag that this is all we're going to be seeing by 2k12.  A different URL for every limb.  Everybody is so desensitized to billboards these days that they've become obsolete.  Get used to seeing all your favorite adds on forearms and foreheads and such.  American Apparel has already contacted me about running an add for their new Unisex Demin Slacks on my lower back.  Gotsta Get Paid.

photo by LastNightsParty

Growing Pains

 It seems that entry level alt chicks are stepping up their game.  They've graduated from rading American Apparel and have obviously moved into the "i only shop at vintage stores" stage.  Next thing you know, they'll be dating sketchy guys in their 30's that can't hold down a job for more than a week.  Wow, so crazy watching these kids grow up, it seems like just yesterday that they were finding out what the hypemachine was.  Life goes by so fast, cherish every moment. 

I would probably let each one of them give me a tug or two. except for the one on the right...I'm not being mean...it's just that I have standards.

photo by The Cobrasnake

Electro Globalization

///Electro has landed in the hands of the infidels.  Take notice.  

What you see pictured above is a few kids from Iran in the possession of the Scion IHEARTCOMIX mixtape.  You might think it's cute that kids from Iran are being exposed to the zany side of Western culture but the truth is far darker than you can imagine.  Giving these kids an IHEARTCOMIX mixtape is the equivalent of giving them a map of the Whitehouse.  Sure, you think I'm crazy and that I'm overreacting but THINK ABOUT THIS:

With these mixtapes, these children can learn everything there is to know about alternative culture.  Once they move stateside, they'll be hitting up American Apparel so they can blend in.  After a while, people will start seeing them as alts and not as infidels.  But here's where it gets interesting...

This past Halloween, there were 15,000 kids at HARD Haunted Mansion.  Most of which were rolling on E or black-out drunk.  These INFIDELS could easily infiltrate the next HARD Fest undetected.  Next thing you know, 15,000 kids are being blown to bits by home-made explosives.  All the while, the infidels went by unsuspected just because they blended in.  And who's to blame?  Frankie Chan, that's who.  

Crafty jew.   

meme by IHEARTCOMIX

ALT OR MNSTRM?

I'm wearing the AA Fine Jersey Stripe Tank today (pictured above)...and I'm severely conflicted.  I can't tell whether I look like an altbro or a mainstream douchebro.  Maybe I look a little bit like both?  I'm wearing it with gray skinny jeans and TOMS but I'm not sure if that's enough to convert my outfit to 'completely alternative.'  I saw a bro at In-N-Out a few weeks ago wearing the same tank, but he was a mainstream bro that was on steroids because I could tell he was wearing the tank to show off his guns.  Can't blame him :(.  But I'm basically the same build as the altbro in the picture, so I'm in the clear right?  Ooooo, but I don't have rad tats to prove my alt status.  I'M SO FUCKING CONFUSED.  Maybe I should just change shirts to be on the safe side.