Scalp Care

[Click the pic for a closer look]

Look at the picture.  Now, look closer at the picture.  JFK has some mad dandruff going on.  Check it out for yourself.  Doesn't he know never to wear black when you have a dandruff problem?  And doesn't he know he should be using Head and Shoulders?  By the looks of it he hasn't washed his hair in a few months so I guess it's unreasonable for me to hound him for not using Head and Shoulders when he doesn't use shampoo at all.  But seriously, he needs to get that scalp under control; his shoulder looks like it was lightly dusted with powdered sugar (or cocaine).  I hope AL P is leaning in to clue in JFK about his dandruff problem.

photo by The Cobrasnake

Puppeteering

Thank god DJ's are no longer using masks as a gimmick.  I hear puppeteering is the next big thing for all the bloghaus DJs.  This blow up doll is just a crude prototype for what will soon be the future of DJ gimmicks.  I hear they're still perfecting the technology for the puppet strings but once they get the bugs worked out every respectable DJ will want a puppeteering kit.  Before you know it, all of your favorite DJs will be dressed up in black spandex camouflage and the star of the show will be their puppets. 

[photo by The Cobrasnake]

TME BRINGS YOU: An Exposay Piece

Here at The Meme Economy we like to deliver scandalous news as it develops.  Rumors had surfaced for months that the Cobrasnake and his autistic girlfriend shared the same clothes.  Today, we can bring you breaking news by confirming these vicious rumors with hard evidence.   FACT: The Cobrabro and his gf share the same wardrobe.  

The couple can be seen in these private photographs wearing the same shirt on different days.  Is the Cobrasnake so low on funds that he has to buy his clothes as a timeshare?  I knew the economy was bad, but this is an all new low.

Personally, I applaud the couple for having the perfect symbiotic relationship.  Sometimes I wish my girlfriend would let me wear her black skinny jeans but she says I'll just stretch them out with my fat.  I'm glad the happy couple has decided to compromise by buying a shirt in the largest size available; that way, they're 'fashion forward.'  Brilliant.

EDIT: I can't wait until this shirt appears in 'The Cobra Shop' for $60.

[photos by The Cobrasnake]

I'm Thankful for Memes

I'm thankful for memes

///I'm thankful for Ableton Live [for allowing talentless people to make shitty music]

///I'm thankful for Ray-Ban Wayfarers [for making it easier to pick the trendy people from a large crowd]

///I'm thankful for The Cobrasnake [for giving me coverage of all the rad parties I can't make it to]

///I'm thankful for HipsterRunoff [for delivering memes on a regular basis]

///I'm thankful for Pitchfork [for telling me what I have to listen to if I want to be cool]

///I'm thankful for mp3 blogs [for taking up space on my hard drive with obscure mp3's]

///I'm thankful for The Hype Machine [for pointing out the least obscure of the afformentioned 'obscure mp3's' so I won't waste time downloading them]

///I'm thankful for my altbros and althos [for accompanying me to my local dance parties]

///I'm thankful for fake ID's [for getting me into the afformentioned dance parties]

///I'm thankful for American Apparel [for making it possible to seem fashionable without actually being fashionable]

///I'm thankful for vinyl [I don't actually have any, but I feel like being thankful for it makes me more authentic]

///I'm thankful for my alternative life [for giving me a false sense of authenticity]

Cobranake Gossip

This is Mark "The Cobrasnake" Hunter's girlfriend.  And she is mildly retarded.  She first experimented with drugs when she was 13.  Lost her virginity when she was 14.  Dropped out of remedial school when she was 15.  Went to rehab when she was 16.  Homeless by 17.  Dating the Cobrasnake by 18.  A cruel downward spiral.  

The Upside: She and the Cobrabro have the same exact aesthetic so at least they can borrow one another's clothes.  It's a relationship of convenience.  

At least it's a step up from Cory Kennedy...and at least this girl actually looks like she could be legal.  good job cobrabro, attwaytogo

photo by the cobrasnake

Growing Pains

 It seems that entry level alt chicks are stepping up their game.  They've graduated from rading American Apparel and have obviously moved into the "i only shop at vintage stores" stage.  Next thing you know, they'll be dating sketchy guys in their 30's that can't hold down a job for more than a week.  Wow, so crazy watching these kids grow up, it seems like just yesterday that they were finding out what the hypemachine was.  Life goes by so fast, cherish every moment. 

I would probably let each one of them give me a tug or two. except for the one on the right...I'm not being mean...it's just that I have standards.

photo by The Cobrasnake

The CobraBro Economy

The Cobrasnake is bridging the gap from 'party pix photographer' to 'vintage clothes distributor' with the invention of "The Cobra Shop." The only problem is that the stuff in the shop is just shit from his closet that he doesn't want to wear anymore.  Every garment has already been permeated with the rank stench of his bare body.  This can mean only one thing: the Cobrabro has run out of funds.  I guess being a party photog three nights a week isn't enough to cover his double mortgage anymore.  I know that the financial crisis has been dominating tv coverage for the past couple of weeks but the gravity of the situation didn't hit me until just now.  If the cobrabro can't survive in this economy, nobody can.  We're all fucked.  Collect whatever change you can and stimulate the economy by donating to the CobraBro Fund.  Donations will be accepted through pay pal.  Nothing under $5, dig deep.